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Its really exciting that you want to get married in church, and it can and should be a wonderful, special and memorable occasion. We have lots of weddings every year, so we have a lot of experience and everything should run like clockwork. We also know the kind of things that do and don't work!

There are various legal requirements because we are acting as a Government Registrar, but apart from these we hope that you will be able to make the day special to you, and if you have imaginative or creative ideas then do let us know early so we can try and accommodate them.

Legally ...

Before you go any further you should know that you can only get married in St. John's or St. Michael's if you or your fiancé live in the parish or regularly attend worship at one of the churches (you need to be coming regularly for 6 months to be on the Electoral Roll).

[There are ways round this in exceptional circumstances, but they can be costly, and are not always successful. Please do contact the Rector if you want to discuss this]

If that's OK then the process goes like this:

You phone the Rector to discuss a possible date and time. He sends you a Pink form to fill in with your details, and when you return that with £100 deposit (cheques made payable to "Bemerton PCC" please) he will write and confirm that that time and church is booked. Please be careful when filling in the Pink form and write clearly as we will use this for filling in the Registers Weddings take place at 11:00 am, 12:30 pm, 2:00 pm and 3:30 pm, but please bear in mind that your preferred option may already be taken.

The Rector writes to you at the beginning of the year, with the latest fees (they're updated every January) and with an invitation to our annual Wedding Fair that usually takes place around Easter. Its a chance for you to see round the church, meet the organist, chat to people about flowers and get a few of those extra details organised.

You will get another letter, 4 months before your wedding, informing you that your Banns are going to be read (see below), and then after that the Rector will phone to arrange a time to visit. At that visit the details of hymns, bells, flowers, readings and time of rehearsal are all discussed and arranged. The Rector will ask a bit about you both, in order that the sermon and service may be about you in particular, rather than just A.N.Other wedding couple.

The penultimate thing that happens is the rehearsal, which usually takes place in an evening during the week before. It last about half an hour, and besides the Bride and Groom, the other people that need to be there are the Best Man, Bridesmaids, and whoever is giving the Bride away (if you are doing that) so that we can go through what happens in the service.

Some other things you need to think about:

Banns

The Banns are the legal way of informing the world that you are getting married, and asking if there is any objection. If either of you lives in another parish, then the Banns must also be called there. The Rector there will issue a certificate saying that the Banns have been called, and that no-one has objected. If you move out of the parish then your Banns could be invalid, and the wedding would then have to be postponed, moved to another church, or even canceled. So don't plan to move house too far! Banns are "called" at the church in which you are getting married, during the morning service, on the first 3 Sundays of the month. We do them 3 months before your wedding month - so we call them in April for a June wedding, or June for an August one and so on. There is no legal requirement for you to be present when the Banns are called, but it is helpful if someone can be there for the first reading, to check that all the details are correct. If they are not called when you expect them, or there is anything wrong with the details, please tell the minister leading the service immediately after the service, and he or she will put matter right as soon as possible.

Music

We have more than one organist, and they are all used to playing at weddings. We also have a trained volunteer choir, and a volunteer music group for the more modern type of worship songs. You should be aware that the choir are "on holiday" in August. If you wish to use the organ, but provide your own organist, there will still be a fee, as this is part of the organist's contract. You will need to decide on suitable music for the entry of the bride, for the final procession, and for the signing of the registers. You may also have two hymns or worship songs during the service. These should be chosen in consultation with the Organist and Rector, as the most beautiful words will sound dreadful if no-one knows the tune! This is something to discuss at the Interview.

Suggestions for Wedding Hymns and Processional Music

Music at entrance of bride
Trumpet Voluntary - Jeremiah Clark
Trumpet Tune - Purcell
Nun Danket Alle Gott - Karg Elert
Trumpet Tune - Charpentier
Wedding March - Wagner
Hornpipe ("water music" - Handel)
Minuet ("Royal Fireworks" - Handel)

Hymns:
104 For the beauty of the earth (Tune 450)
113 Father, hear the prayer we offer (as set or 509)
115 Dear Lord and Father of mankind
116 All things Bright and Beautiful
131 Love divine all loves excelling (as set or 464)
152 0 Holy Spirit, Lord of grace
154 Gracious Spirit, Holy Ghost
156 Comedown. 0 Love divine (1st tune)
192 Praise my soul, the King of heaven
200 Fill thou my life, 0 Lord my God
205 Now thank we all our God
224 Lead us heavenly Father, lead us
280 '0 perfect Love, all human thoughts
374 Help us to help each other, Lord (tune 200)
378 Jesus, good above all other
379 Jesus, humble was your birth
380 Jesus, Lord, we look to thee
391 Lord Jesus Christ, you have come to us
393 Lord of all good, (tune:- tell out, my soul)
394 Lord of all hopefulness (tune 395 Slane)
450 Crown with love, Lord, this glad day (Eng.Lane)
459 Give me joy in my heart
471 Holy Spirit, come, confirm us (tune: all for Jesus)
482 Life is great, so sing about it! (tune 192)
Hymn Book - Ancient & Modern New Standard

Music for final procession
Wedding March - Mendelssohn
Toccata from 5th Org. Symph. - Widor
Nun Danket Alle Gott - Karg Elert
Grand March from Aida - Verdi
March from Occ. Oratorio - Handel
Minuet ("Royal Fireworks") Handel
Toccata & Fugue in D Minor - Bach
(All Trumpet Tunes from "entrance" section are also suitable.)

Orders of Service

We provide the necessary service books, and hymn books, so a printed order of service is not strictly necessary, but it does make a pleasant memento of the occasion. It should only include the order and the words of the hymns. Please show the "proof" copy to the Rector so that he can check it is all correct before printing the full amount. We are able to produce an order of service for you at a cost of £25 for 100, please ask for details.

A Typical order of service might be:

• Welcome
• Hymn
• The Declarations
• Reading
• Talk
• Hymn
• The Vows
• The Giving of Rings
• Registration of the Marriage
• Prayers
• Dismissal

Parking

If you think there will more than 20 cars, you might want to consider asking the cricket club to open the field next to the church. They ask for a small donation (not sure what it is at the moment - but around £20).
Their phone number is: 327 108

Size of Venue

St. John's Church is able to hold 150 people, and St. Michael's 200. St. Andrew's is not licensed for weddings.

Photo's and Video's

Its great to have a record of the occasion, and we have no objection to photographers or videos, its your day and you should get what you want where possible. Which is by way of a warning that some photographers will arrange you and organise you until you feel its not your wedding anymore! Whether you are using a professional or a friend, make sure that they know exactly the shots you want - whether you want them to be standing over your shoulder as you say your vows or not, whether you want them to stop your procession going down the aisle, etc. The day is about you, not your photographer, so be firm! If you are using a competent photographer they should not need to use a flash inside. Please note that some members of the choir have epilepsy and flashes can trigger a fit, this may be true of some of your guests, so please don't use flash photography.

If you are having video there is a good place to put a stationary camera up in the choir, and we suggest that any other handheld shots are from the congregation point of view. Because of the copyright of performance and recording of music you must pay the copyright fee if anyone in the building is using a video recorder.

Flowers

Most of the year there will usually be some flowers in church. The flowers are provided and arranged by church volunteers. During the 6 weeks before Easter we keep the church free of flowers, as a reminder that we are in a time of self denial, following Jesus on his journey to the Cross . If you wish to have flowers during this time, we ask that you arrange to have them removed afterwards.

If you wish to do extra flowers yourself, or if you wish to have a professional company do extra flowers for you, please make sure that you consult Mr. Kelly (504 349) or Mrs. Hatcher (501 723) for St. John's. For St. Michael's please tell Jenny Thomas (320 294). You must let us know at least a month beforehand, to ensure that we know what you are doing and don't put up a display which is not needed.

You should have been told if there are other weddings on the same day, so that you can co-ordinate colours or agree to split the cost. Don't assume you're the only thing happening in church, last year someone left the flower arranging till the last minute and was nearly too late as there was another church function beforehand.

Dresses

Mr Andrew Kelly can also design and make dresses for your wedding day (and any other occasion). Please do get in touch if you are interested - 504 349.

Usher and Verger

It is helpful if you can provide one or two people to act as ushers. Their task is to make sure that everyone is seated in the right places, and has all the books and papers they need. We also provide a Verger or member of the congregation to help these ushers, who also receives a fee for filling in the registers.

Confetti

We are very happy for you to use confetti to celebrate your special day. Please don't use it indoors, and use paper, not metal or plastic stuff (you'd be surprised!).

Bells

St. John's has a set of chimes, which sound like bells, but are played by a single ringer. St. Michael's has no bells at all.

The Cost - 2005 Fees

These Fees are subject to the Church's Central Board of Finance, and our PCC, and will go up every January, usually in line with inflation.

Adults

If you are an adult who wants to get baptised please come along to church and make yourself known to whoever is leading the service. They would be only too delighted to talk to you about what it means to make such a decision and to answer any questions you might have. They will also put you in touch with other people who can help you to grow in your faith and serve in the church.

Children

Its really exciting that you want to bring your child to be baptised (baptism and christening are the same thing), and we want you and your family to know as much about what it involves and what goes on at church as possible. We know that lots of people aren't regular churchgoers and so often feel uncomfortable and anxious in services, which children can often pick up and it makes them unhappy too! That's why we have baptisms in a Family Service. Its a little less formal, is more noisy and lively, and children seem to relate to it better.

Legally...

I'm afraid that Church Law forbids us to baptise people who live outside our parish unless you regularly worship at one of the churches (you need to be coming regularly for 6 months to be on the Electoral Roll).

If that's ok though, then this is what happens:

When you phone the Rector to say that you want a baptism for your child, or children, he will take your name and address. Because some people feel a bit overwhelmed by clergy, and so that you can begin to get to know more of the church family, he will try to arrange for a couple of people from the church to pop round and visit. This is just to get details about the child and Godparents for the registers, and to explain a bit about the church and answer any questions you may have.

Then you, and the Godparents, will be invited to a Party - on a Sunday afternoon, up at St. Michael's Community Centre. Here there will be games for the children and things to eat, and you will get to meet other parents who are getting their children baptised, and other people in the church. The Rector will also explain a bit about what Baptism is, and what is expected of you as parents and Godparents.

After this you might like to come to 1 or 2 family services, to ask for a service of Thanksgiving, or you may decide to ring the Rector and ask to go ahead with a Baptism for your child.

These take place during Family services.

After your child is baptised we would love you to come to the regular Family service, or at least to the special services that we have for Easter, Harvest and Christmas.